How to travel with your best mate
- GeographySurf
- Feb 17, 2022
- 5 min read
Updated: Feb 18, 2022

I had just submitted the final essay of my undergraduate degree and Laura was on a lunch break from her masters study. We sipped a ramen and chewed donburri in Wagamamas in Leopold Square (Sheffield) as a small celebration, discussing life after university.
"Why can't we just go and live in Australia or something?" I asked, not really looking forward to the prospect of a full time job so soon, yet equally not seriously contemplating going to Aus (or anywhere for that matter).
"We can." Laura replied. We just stared at each other for a few moments.
That was all it took. A simple question which led to the most incredible, adventurous and crazy year of my life.
A few weeks later, we'd booked one way flights to Aus for January 2019 with absolutely no plan, no clue what we needed to get and no idea whether we'd even have enough money by then. I turned down a schools direct teacher training course.
I got a job in a pub for 3 months instead. After Christmas, we headed out into the great unknown.

And boy, was it the unknown. From an outsider perspective, we were two completely naive girls who had absolutely no clue what they were doing. Everyone would ask us: 'Where are you going next?' 'Are you going to get a job here?' 'Are you going to do the East Coast?'. We could never answer those questions. Instead, we lived completely free and devoid of plans. We'd hear through the grapevine that so-and-so was a great place to visit s
o the next day we'd pack our bags and go. Didn't like it? No problem. Move on down the road and see what else we could discover. Loved it? Stayed for 3 months. That is the beauty of traveling with a friend. No matter where you go, even if it's not providing the best of experiences, you'll always have each other.
Anyone who has been traveling knows that, often, the greatest discoveries are those which are the least expected. We never researched where we were going except for finding a couple of potential camp spots or places to stay nearby. Ok, sometimes this got us into a bit of pickle - like not booking ahead and therefore not getting to go on a trip, for instance. Yet most of the time it made everything so much more exciting. We had little to no expectations of the places we visited. When we arrived, everything was new. We had no preempted ideas about what we were going to see or do. I loved that about our trip. Little expectations led to the greatest discoveries.
But how do you survive 365 days living, working, partying and traveling with the same person? Traveling is, of course, not always fun and games. In fact, it is probably at least 40% stress.
1. Know the bad
Laura and I had lived together during university for 3 out of the 4 years. I knew her bad habits and she knew mine. It also meant that we respected each other's space and understood when we wanted some alone time.
I am a huge introvert. I love my own space. I also (can) suffer with severe anxiety attacks and need to bolt myself in my room for a night. Living with Laura meant she knew all this already and knew how to handle me at my worst. There were no nasty surprises throughout the year that may have created a rift in our friendship.
2. Let each other live
Just because you're traveling together does not mean you need to stay glued to each other's hips for the entire time. You can't physically be with someone for 365 days and not argue, or get annoyed with them. I suppose it is almost like being in a relationship. You each need separate parts of your lives for it to work and to diminish conflict, whether that be a
different job, a different friend or a different hobby. Laura and I shared similar friends, but we also made different ones. That meant that we often socialised without the other being there. We worked different jobs so made different connections and had different experiences of the place we were living. We had space to breathe from each other and I think that is really important.
3. Keep your independence
Similar to the above post, this was a crucial factor in making it work between Laura and I. We are both hugely independent individuals and like to do things on our own. If Laura was tired and wanted to sleep in but I wanted to go to an art gallery for example, then I would go without her. That seems like a very simple and obvious thing but you'd be surprised by how many people go traveling and don't like to explore new places without someone with them. Being independent enough to do what you want without feeling the need to drag the other person with you is important. You aren't going to share all the same interests and some things that you want to do, your friend might not want to. And that is totally fine.
4. It's ok to argue....so long as you apologise
Arguing is natural. Particularly for two opinionated and politically active ladies. We argued over the smallest things, such as the right route to take (I,
being the geographer, was 9/10 times correct) or when we clashed heads with different points of view. Sometimes one of us would be grumpy for no reason, sparking a little confrontation. No one is perfect and traveling is stressful - arguments are going to happen. Argue away, but always acknowledge it and apologise, even if you aren't wrong. Most of the time, grudge bearing is so tiring and there's so much to explore at your finger tips - why would you want to waste it being angry?
5. Not having a cleaning/cooking rota
Biggest bug bear for me is someone creating a rota. Why is it so difficult to muck in? Why does one person have to be responsible for a particular task on a particular date? Sometimes, I would feel tired and not want to cook so Laura would do it. Other times, Laura may have wanted to photograph the sunset and so I would cook. Sometimes I'd cook two nights in a row. Sometimes I'd wash up twice a week and Laura would wash up five times a week. It really didn't matter. We would each pitch in when we needed to and not complain about it or ask questions. Get th
e job done and don't phaff about the who-did-what-when. It is seriously pointless and is a recipe for disaster.

Traveling with Laura was the best thing I could have done. Her naturally social and adventurous personality meant that I followed suit and did things I would never have done back home. It helped me to think less about the bad situations and to just go for things I would have avoided previously. Likewise, my analytical brain made sure that if we were ever in trouble, I knew what to do and how to do it quickly. It kept us a little bit safer.
Choosing to go traveling with someone is a big commitment. Make sure you guys are in the same boat. It worked particularly well for us because we didn't
plan. We would happily do whatever and go wherever. Neither of us were disappointed if we missed somewhere because we hadn't originally planned to go there anyway. Flexibility and understanding are key to making it work.
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